I went back to work and it is AMAZING. I’m sorry, I know I’m meant to go on about how much I missed the little fella, and how my heart was broken in two leaving him but I’m not going to. I was very sad leaving him the first day, and a little teary the second, but once I got into the office and sat at my desk and drank the first of two MAGNIFICENT takeaway coffees without one interruption, well my friends, I was pretty darn delighted.
I spent the day writing about parenty stuff which was thoroughly enjoyable and in between that had a massive hearty bond with the girls in the office, careening from topics as gripping as where to get the best flower dress with a nipped in waist to Gwyneth Paltrow is such a pain in the arse – why do we secretly love her?
The best thing, THE BEST THING was that I didn’t talk about baby stuff for the whole day. I talked about ME and my feelings. And my hair. And my makeup. Which I had gotten up extra early to faff about with. Yes it was work, and it was tiring and when I got home that night I was pretty exhausted. But. When I saw the little fella, and he gave me that special smile he gives his Daddy when he comes in from work, and jumped out of his Dad’s arms to come to me, well, it was game over. I had little fella snuggles for the evening and all was right with the world.
Yes, it takes way more planning to go back to work. And yes, I am very fortunate because I am working part time. And mostly Yes, I am lucky because I have the holy grail of childminders – the little fella’s grannies – taking care of him while I am at the office. But for me, the first week was a freeing experience. I didn’t realise how much of myself I had left behind when I went on maternity leave. I felt like I was back in the world again – as me – for the first time in a long time.